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Dear God,

I've been growing up for a while now; I really don't know all that much what I'm doing.
It's like -  I remember you in my childhood, and you were there throughout it. But now its like you don't have the same life that you used to. You remind me of my mom. She really has lot of faith in you. And I know that I'm messing up, and that I'm not nearly good enough for you, not even close, but I can't give in. I keep questioning whether I deserve what I'm getting, all the things you have blessed me with. And overwhelmingly the answer is no. I am a product of the entitled society I am living in. I've been worn down that much.

Beautiful changing season,
how I did enjoy your warmth,
The sunshine brightens fast as I turn my gaze to it,
but I close my eyes before I am blinded.
And when the rain came I was outside with you, cheesin with my mouth open.
My clothes got absolutely soaked, but I didn't care. I laughed.
And the girl I love . . .
Lest her mind wanders and she begins to stare blankly for too long,
I hope your breeze blows the leaves that reminds her of autumn, and helps her move on.

Beautiful . . .
Chocolate, green grass, leisure and sweat.
Hot weather cools, and the cold follows next.

I'm trying to take deep breaths more often now. A slow in, and out; in and out.
I now know that I am dying. It was silly of me to take so long to realize.

Oh Life, I just wish that I could have taken your hand into mine. Looked you in the eye. And
declared honestly and fully my love for you. But the wind always seems to take my words away.

Life is the love I let get away,
She was chocolate and tomatoes. Tomatoes like the ones my mom tried to make me eat.
And that chocolate cake that always ended up being a little too much. But she makes me
happy. She made me happy.

Summer, share this last cigarette, stay with me while I burn.
I gave you all of me. I'll give you this one last bit I forgot.

<3 ~